A Blood Diamond is Forever

We have entered into a new era. Diamonds can now be produced in a lab. This is great news for everyone except De Beers, creators of the “A diamond is forever.” campaign, controllers of the world diamond monopoly, war profiteers and supporters of Apartheid. As one of the most hated companies on earth there is little that they can say in response to great scientific miracle except “oh snap”, with a peculiar Dutch/African accent.

I have never been a fan a diamonds. To me they are just shiny rocks for which Africa has long been held hostage and no slick advertising can change that. The industry tries to portray diamonds as a rare commodity albeit one that you can find in any department store in Anytown, America. I think you can even score this precious stone at such uncommon and prestigious retailers as Wal-Mart and Costco. They hold no nostalgia for me and if I ever were to receive one as a gift you can be certain that I would sell it for cash and immediately use that cash to put a dent in my student loans.

Still De Beers, ignoring the history of the collapse of the natural pearl market under the pressure from cultured pearls, insists that Madison Avenue will be able to convince people that what is special about a De Beers “natural” diamond is that it took nature millions of years to make it and not simply that it is shiny, overpriced and can be used to finance wars. Good luck on that.

I, for one, would consider buying a manufactured diamonds because I, already clothed in sweatshop produced clothing, don’t need to own anymore non-essential items that I feel guilty about. I hope (with great doubt) that celebrities, especially black ones dripping in ridiculous ice, will feel the same way and promote the new diamonds produced by labs like Gemesis and Apollo Diamonds as a political statement. Although given the history of those tacky tastemakers who will promote anything from Nascar to drug violence, I suspect that De Beers has already gotten to them. So, instead we can expect them to spew well crafted marketing arguments attempting to convince us that not buying diamonds from Africa is somehow wrong, somehow unAfrican. I’m sure it wouldn’t be hard for them to bribe, I mean pay for endorsements from people as sophisticated as the average entertainer. They are no fools and those rocks are mighty shiny!